And so - we get home from Thanksgiving, and Grant is SICK. At first we thought, okay he’s just unruly because we just got home, but then his fever spiked and I knew instinctively that all was not okay. I told the boy my mommy sense was screaming and we went to urgent care that night. He had a DOUBLE ear infection, caused by an upper respiratory infection. GREAT. Got antibiotics and off we go. Well then three days later he gets worse again, so I take him into our doc and get him stronger antibiotics.
Did I mention this whole time I was sick, and had a sinus infection? Yep, I felt like my face was loading up and I wanted to DIE. By this time we had been sick for almost three weeks. Sunday night I started puking, and didn’t stop. I was SURE I was pregnant, and had the same dreadful sick feeling and started bawling. My husband put me to bed, “It’s going to be alright honey, I promise.” He’d just say it over and over and rub my head. Needless to say I cried myself to sleep.
Now we’re all fine, but let me tell you….I HATE BEING SICK. I feel terrible for the boy who for three weeks dealt with momma and baby being MISERABLE. It’s something he is kind about but I’m sure he just wanted to die too.
So the latest. Grant is throwing fits of epic mass proportion. He gets mad. Cries hysterically and runs into his run, the corner…wherever and then babbles and yells whilst crying. Big fat tears stream, things get thrown, and life is NOT ok. Last night we had tacos and he wanted to eat a taco like we did. MAN. Greg and I just watched and looked at each other while he ran around raving. He did it again this morning over not playing with scissors, razors, pop cans, my pop, and just anything he could. We are in TROUBLE. He’s definatley got my temperament and it’s scary. I’m wondering what I did to my parents, and I’m afraid I’m going to find out. My mom says it’s scary to hang out with him, because he’s just a little me. His pictures and mine at his age are just creepy wierd similar, and she says he even has my mannerisms at this age. My parents LOVE it. I am nervous.
But again today I picked him up and he cried laid his head on my shoulder, patted me, and raved on and on. I said, “I know that you are mad.” It escalated from there, and ended up in a time out. He has a naughty chair now, and he knows something’s up when he sits there and just looks at me puzzled. He gets quiet, and then I go over and explain what he did and why he can’t do that. Then I tell him to say he’s sorry, and he hugs and pats me.
I can’t believe I’m disciplining my child. I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT. I’m realizing though that if I don’t I’m in more trouble than if I do. So I’m going to need some help from Dr. Dobson I think. God help me.
Saturday marks the boy and I’s ten year anniversary. It’s been fun the last week, reliving all our relationship. It’s so amazing to me who I thought I would be ten years ago, and who I am. I thought I would have so many kids, and have life so figured out. I’m just astounded by the last ten years, and while I’m sad the time’s gone so fast, I’m infinitely proud of who we’ve become. It only goes up from here.
A ten year anniversary sparks a lot in a household. For us it’s sparked a moment of recognition, that we’re not 17 anymore. We can’t keep living a crazy, whirlwind existence any longer. So we’ve dedicated the next six months to settling down. I’m not going to be doing any bible studies, or anything that takes me out of the house at night. The boy is going to try and do the same, as life allows. I’m going to focus on getting some things right. Like being a housewife, a good wife to my husband, and a better mommy to Grant. It’s brought us a lot of peace already, and I’m excited about what it will do for our family. We’re focusing on family, on expanding it, and nesting. I’m also excited to grow deeper in my relationship with God, and get that foundation laid. I’ve realized that I can go to a lot of bible studies, and be out and about all the time if I want but ultimately it’s not going to do any good unless I get a good foundation laid for my family. I want a good legacy for my kids, and I want to be a rock…built on the rock. :) It’s scary, and sparked a lot of dicussion.
And of THE discussion. Are we doing the right thing by living in Minneapolis? Should we be looking to move to Iowa soon? That discussion is coming up more and more, as we notice Grant not spending enough time with Greg’s mom, and just feeling the strain of not having family around to help. We miss our family, we want that for Grant too. And should other babies come, as you add you need more help! It’s always on the table, and we’re letting God have that one. We’re praying that should that be where we need to go he’ll show us clearly. It’s His choice ultimately, and one that would change everything. The boy wouldn’t necessarily have to get a new job, as he’s secured a place in his firm now…but it would change his day to day dramatically…and ours. It’s all things we’re talking about and praying about…it’s just weird. We never thought we’d move back - at least for a long time. But there’s something about Iowa that keeps pulling us back. I don’t know God’s plan, but I do know that now that the boy is not closing the door on that option, it changes everything.
I’ve stayed home more days this week than I ever have. I like it. I like the routine the wee one and I have established.
Life is just good…..sweet, and full. It’s nice to relax and have time to dream again. :) It’s been a long time since we’ve even just been able to do that.
And next week I’m off to Iowa from Monday to Thursday as the boy jets off to Spain!!! Wahoo. I’m excited about seeing the family, and just excited about this week being over. My last bible study is tonight and Saturday and it just feels like I’m graduating into a new phase of my life. The phase that I’ve been wanting but running away from at the same time. It’s time for me to step up and be the woman I’ve been called to be, and this is the first of many steps in that direction.
God save the Queen. 
