So the last couple of weeks have blown chunks. Obviously.
But things are looking up. We have great friends, one close set who saw their little one this week, and others who just had babies, who just are fabulous, and some who just love us. It seriously makes our lives such a different place to have people close to reach out an lift you up and shake you off. We’ve been able to mourn and be sad (AKA - Jenny bawling through church each Sunday) but wake up each day hopeful and happy that our little boy is such a wonderful little person. And ornery, and busy, and moving, and not stopping, and making his mommy and daddy very very tired.
The feeb rocks the cashbah.
So this past week has been adventure for me. I took on three of my friends little ones, they are five, two, and three. Somewhere my brain had a disconnect, and I thought that this would be great! I thought they would just color and hang out and I have a million toys so no problem. Uhhhh older kids get bored, and the world isn’t such a fascinating place anymore. The feeb will play for days, and when he gets bored with one thing, he goes and searches out another. These kids whine. They talk back, they require boundaries, explanations that make sense, and honestly a LOT of work from me to make their short four hour stay something fun and worthwhile. There was also a discussion about rates, one that while I understand childcare is expensive, kind of left me making her a deal. After this week, I realized it was making me WAY too tired, and way too ugly. I was grumpy, dreading each morning, and just not making something that I or the kids would love. I love this friend dearly, and I love her kids. They are brilliant, and just a lot of fun. I just didn’t realize how much work it would be. And honestly I could take one little baby and make just as much money. I decided to leave it in God’s hands, and low and behold I scored a three month old baby this week named Lily. Yeeeesssss…..I cannot tell you how excited I am to have a little baby around again. It’s going to be like Christmas. 
The only problem is letting my friend down without making it a huge deal. I’m sure she’ll be great, because we left everything on a trial period, but it’s hard for me to have these discussions because I’m such a people pleaser. Regardless I feel peace about it because at the end of the day I have to be a mom and a wife and get housework done. And make my husband not want to run downstairs.
I’m going to LA on WEDNESDAY YEEESSSSSSS. I have books all picked out, and Wednesday afternoon the boy nad I are going to take a scenic tour of all the touristy crap. Then I will be on the beach with my books and God. I cannot wait.
The other stress in my life, they put me in charge of childcare for our Tuesday morning bible study, and it’s something everyone freaks out about. They’re driving me nuts.
Okay - I need to eat breakfast, and get the Feebus out from in front of the TV. He’s such a little TV head sometimes. It’s hilarious.
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